Older dating younger women
I want to be in a relationship, and I’m worried it’s not going to happen. Here’s what I think about middle-aged men who say that they’re looking for much younger women: it’s often a dream, driven by a midlife crisis or a bruised ego.If you come across a profile of an older man who seems like a good guy, just ignore the age requirements listed and write to him anyway.
But a real man, one who wants a relationship with a fabulous woman over 50, will probably view your profile and think, “This woman looks and sounds incredible.I want to get to know her.”Biologically speaking, we are all hardwired to seek out the most youthful, robust partner.No matter our age, we want to be with someone who will live a long, healthy life.Back in the day, when marriage was about having a partner to help run the farm and procreate, before love stepped in to complicate marriage, men looked for signs of fertility in women–rosy cheeks and wide hips.I am not terribly conventional, I have a doctorate, and I’m fairly independent.I also look about 10 years younger than my age (54).
I am really energetic and still enjoy many of the things I enjoyed in my 20s and 30s.
But in online dating, men my age are not looking at women my age. The men I do hear from are older than me by 10-15 years and are looking for a far more relaxed lifestyle or trying too hard to be youthful (If it is genuine, great, if not, it’s annoying.) I don’t want to date men who remind me of my dad, who want to eat quiet dinners every night or sit home watching movies.
On the flip side, when I meet men in real life, I do attract more of the type I like—my age or younger and energetic.
Yet, when they find out how old I am or that my kids are in their late teens, they get freaked out (much like they get when they learn I have a Ph D), as if I have tricked them somehow on purpose.
I guess when the right guy comes along, this won’t happen, but I feel very discouraged and am not sure any more where to look to meet anyone.
How does one navigate this “glass ceiling” of aging?