08-Nov-2015 20:50

Im dating a virgin

At 16, I had my first boyfriend, and telling him I was a virgin was a no-brainer because he was also my first kiss.

So at 16, I thought I had it all figured out: find someone special and all the pieces will fit together (pun intended). In my freshman year I dated this guy who seemed perfect: sweet, smart, and handsome, the whole deal.You might think you’re one of the few collegiettes who’s still a virgin, but, the fact is, you’re not alone!We know from HC’s Ultimate College Girl Survey that a lot of you (actually, 43% of you) are virgins.You haven’t hit 40-year-old virgin status yet, so stop stressing or thinking you have to lose it to the next guy you meet.The guy I’d been seeing sporadically for months was truly special, a kind boy with chocolate-brown eyes and that boyish shyness I couldn’t get enough of. When I confirmed it, I asked him why he was surprised.He told me about his past sexual history, that he and his girlfriend had waited for each other, and that she was the only one he’d ever been with. I was expecting him to say that I didn’t seem like the “type,” or else ask me personal questions about whether or not I was waiting for marriage or something. I guess I just thought it would have happened for you already.” It was such a simple statement, so straightforward and honest.

Hesitantly, with my head on his shoulder in his big wide bed, I all but whispered the words, “I’ve never had sex before.” Nervous about his response, I expected shock, discomfort, misunderstanding.

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The physical stuff came pretty quickly, but when I stopped him going too far and told him why, I felt tears come into my eyes.

He wasn’t mean or judgmental about it—we were just about 18 after all—but he laughed at me when he saw the tears in my eyes and suddenly I felt misunderstood, and more important, pressured. I knew that my emotional reaction meant that something about him didn’t sit well with me. Meeting guys in bars or going on first dates was much more complicated during my college years, because when the time came—when that question,“Wanna come back to my apartment? That happened so many times that I practically perfected my responses, and, more than that, I avoided first dates. Would every “good” first date end in an invitation for sex?

Suddenly, my love requirement seemed flimsy and unattainable.

The third time I told a guy I was a virgin, I remember pushing myself to get the words out.

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