21-Oct-2015 19:09

Best first message to send on dating sites

There are two main goals for a first message: to let her know of your interest, and to convince her that you are an interesting non creepy guy that isn't going to take advantage of her the first chance you get. "First messages that are only one word, incomplete sentences, full of profanity or just generic comments about my looks are a big turn-off. The problem is: The crowd that bothers to surf the forums of this place, have a completely different mentality than the crowd that hasn't even seen the "forums" button.

Compliments like these in a first message come across as creepy. I like simple and encouraging messages such as "Hello, looks like we have a lot of common interests. "After doing my year end accounts and having an idea what my tax bill is going to look like, I visualize the perfect first message to come from the laptop of an 89 year old Millionaire, with a weak heart and no family. It's extremely rare that I get one of those kinds of short messages from a guy, click on his profile and find that it is well-written and he's a good match for me. Dude has to know grammar and spelling and not call me babe or gorgeous or say "you're hot" or anything like that.Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. I've found that 9 times out 10, the guys that write one-word/lazy messages don't have much to offer in their profile either.Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... It's extremely rare that I get one of those kinds of short messages from a guy, click on his profile and find that it is well-written and he's a good match for me.Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate. Mostly it's just a bunch of pics with his buddies at a bar and the 'About Me' section says "Ask me and I'll tell you" or a series of random letters to take up space.Hi girl's I would be interested in knowing what you think the perfect first message would look like I am not talking general terms, like specifically, write a message bellow that you would want to receive as a first message from a guy(hope this doesn't break forum rules, sorry if it does)Sorry, not a woman, but I also know that there's no such thing as a perfect message, just things to avoid doing. Just be sincere and don't be discouraged if you don't get replies - not everyone is going be a match for you and vice-versa. ;)This is fine and dandy, and a well thought-out response to the OP.That's what the perfect first message would look like. Mostly it's just a bunch of pics with his buddies at a bar and the 'About Me' section says "Ask me and I'll tell you" or a series of random letters to take up space. I'm not vain and I don't want people to comment on my looks. So if they introduce themselves, pick up on an interest in my profile and expand on it i.e. I don't like really long messages or sounding too much that they're trying to impress me.

In all seriousness, for me, there is no perfect first message. Just be sincere and don't be discouraged if you don't get replies - not everyone is going be a match for you and vice-versa. ;)Great question - it's awesome that you're actaully putting thought into. [uggh]Hey Hi/hello'Sup How r u Hey sexy/sweetie/hun/baby/cutieu hot Messages that DO get a response from me show me that 1) the guy actually read my profile 2) is respectful and 3) genuinely wants to get to know me. You can do that by changing your phrasing, what words you use and writing more short and direct sentences.

There isn't a message which will work repeatedly on the same woman unless it was always sent by the same man. Let's start with a few examples of messages I am NOT in any way inclined to respond to, yet receive every. That automatically makes you come across as more confident. My gay man friend gave me some great tips on how to write messages to men which was actually pretty helpful.

Likewise, one woman's perfect message will have others hitting the back button so fiercely, they risk breaking the keyboard. Seems like men are the same whether gay or straight.a ";)" works for me sometimes. Insulting them works sometimes when they have long qualifying lists like my profile makes fun of. A silly joke or role playing skit works other times.

If a man who *I* viewed as attractive in some way, had a profile which showed independent thought, a sense of humor, and an understanding of who he was, was in his 40's and in my area, then I would most likely reply. Sometimes an individual message works when she ACTUALLY has a decent written profile.

It wouldn't matter if his message was a simple introduction or more complex. More often than not..do not write something that's sucks......although I have sent messages that I think suck big time. Good profiles will make a women more confident to initiate after all she will have something to comment on.

It doesn't mean I'll meet everyone who writes and fits that criteria, but I would be open to communicating to learn about core values, what type of man he was, honesty etc. I have pretty much come to the conclusion that the spread is only 10% based on messages. Some things that I do when I write messages to women who grab my attention and interest is make the message about them to show that I've taken time to read their profile.

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